So Brentwood, we meet again. After my recent debut, it seems as though my column has risen to the top of the charts, the Hot 100 of The Nest if you will. Just kidding, but I have gotten several more emails since my first column. And for that, I thank you all. I thank you for your blind trust and juicy drama. Nothing makes my little heart sing more than hearing the ins and outs of your personal dilemmas. I’m glad we can build this parasocial relationship together. But enough of all the mushy stuff, we’re here for advice, are we not?!
As previously mentioned, I have received a plethora of questions as of late. Lucky for you guys, I have a plethora of answers! I’m like an encyclopedia in that sense, only less square (I hope). But I digress, let’s move on to our first question.
Dear Anonymous,
Should I confront my friend?
-Shaggy
Well Shaggy, this one all depends on the situation at hand.
If your friend has done nothing more than forget to give you your pencil back – as infuriating as that can be – I don’t think confrontation is needed. But if they threatened to use your dog as a football replacement in an NFL kickoff, then I think confrontation is more than needed. I’m going to assume your issue lies somewhere in the middle; something along the lines of your friend talking behind your back or causing problems.
In this case, I think it’s a good idea to confront them. If you find it too difficult to confront them in person, doing it over text is a totally valid option as well. Make sure you approach them in a mature, respectful manner. Don’t come off too strong, but be firm in your approach, and let them know EXACTLY how you feel. If they’re a true friend, you guys should be able to work things out. If things begin to go south, however, please note that:
a.) I am not liable in this situation so please do not contact my lawyers, and
b.) as much as it may sting, a bad outcome may show the true colors of your friend.
Seeing these true colors, as much as it may suck, can help you decide whether they’re someone you still want to keep around in your life. Best of luck to you and your hopefully false-colored friend.
Dear Anonymous,
What are your opinions on sun bears?
– Scooby Doo
Scoob–can I call you Scoob? Thank you for your entry. This bear looks like a totem poll. Stiff. Kind of dead in the eyes. A rather goofy-looking creature indeed. I love it. You know exactly what the readers want. May you be prosperous with all the Scooby Snacks in the world. I appreciate the photo for reference as well.
Dear Anonymous,
Should I turn my friend in to the principal????????
-Velma
Velma, it seems you’re in the same boat as Shaggy. Again, this one entirely depends on the situation at hand. Your friend cackled by instinct when you took a massive spill down the stairs instead of helping you? Maybe talk it out over coffee before getting administration involved. All joking aside though, if you’re worried your friend is going to hurt themselves, hurt others, or that they’re partaking in risky behavior, then you should absolutely turn them in. This goes out to everyone reading this; it’s better for your friend to be mad at you for snitching than to have them hurt themselves. So Velma, if this is happening to your friend, or you suspect it is, then turn them in by all means. You could be helping so much more than you realize. I wish you the best of luck.
Thank you to those who have submitted entries so far. If you have a burning question, email me at [email protected] for your chance to have your entry featured in The Nest. Remember, I’m not the only anonymous one in this situation; all participants are to remain under a pseudonym, so don’t be afraid to reach out. I’ll see you curious kiddos on the flip side!
